Something ain’t right
Kristin clearly remembers standing in a hallway waiting for mom to come out of the bathroom with friends who were shooting up. She remembers feeling alone and what she would today call abandoned. She felt danger and fear often. She mentions putting up walls. She became hyper-vigilant and always aware of everything going on around her.
She remembers one day, when she was still around 6, needing to follow her instinct to go through some brush. In a clearing when the sun peered through the trees, there it was.
“I am pure love.”
A-ha in action
In the moment, it was a sense of comfort. She mentioned feeling grace, spirit, God and just utter peace. Of course, a six year old doesn’t know how to put that in action, but it stimulated a lifetime of work.
The work for her was having the choice to act from her broken, abandoned place or her place of pure love and grace.
The challenge as Kristin says it, is ‘to mind the gap’. By that she means the moment when you have the choice to act from connection and love or act from the fearful child. The gap gets smaller, but there are always challenges. One of those are often when your kids get to be the age where your trauma happened. (Her daughter just so happens to be turning 6 soon, by the way.)
For Kristin, it’s about being mindful that she can represent love or broken. It means showing up as love even when she may feel like going with broken.
Kristin probably embraced shift at many levels over her lifetime. I know her more personally and can tell you it’s evident that she embraces pure love as an attitude. She connects people and cheers them on. Even now, she has been embracing this memory again now to keep her mindful (in my opinion) of how she reacts to her daughter at this age.
To really hear the story right, you really should hear it from her on the video. You can watch it here
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