Do you let shoulds get the best of you?

I have to… I gotta… I should…

When we think about all the roles we have and all the many things we could do to live up to some standard of being a parent, an employee, a daughter or son, a friend, a spouse, a volunteer… we could get bogged down with overwhelming responsibility and checklists. If we’re feeling overwhelmed, we need to check our expectations and priorities. We need to relook at our whys.

If your feeling maxed out or overwhelmed, here’s something I’ve been trying. See if it works for you.

Get in touch with that inner rebellious teenager energy — the one that needs to know what the consequences are for not checking the list. Get that huffy puffy tone and ask Continue reading “Do you let shoulds get the best of you?”

Setting goals that reward you

On the Inviting Shift Show, I had coaches Clay Green and Michelle Brown join me to talk about setting goals so that we aren’t self-sabotaging and we get what we want on the way to the goal and when we get there.

I’ve written about expectations here. Expectations can create impossible goals if we let them go too far. They can get out of hand and then the big dream can seem ruined if it doesn’t live up to every detail you’d imagined. So we set a goal and let go of expectations. We still show up, we still aim at the goal, but we stay open to new opportunities and twists in the road.

It’s much simpler than it seems. The three of us were able to get to the nitty gritty and come up with the basics of goal-setting for goals you’ll actually enjoy along the way and when you get to point b.

#1 Know your why.

Before we can successfully do anything, we need to know why we are doing it. Why do I want this big goal? Or maybe you don’t even know what you want. This is also a good place to start. Continue reading “Setting goals that reward you”

Staying in the Flow with a Bad Mood Day

Even the most positive, happy-go-lucky people have bad mood days.

Today, as I write this, I’m experiencing a wave of failure, disappointment and sadness. This flood of emotion that has become familiar with time and curiosity. I used to fear this wave believing it would sweep me up and take me away never to be happy again. I would panic and try to fix it or fake it. I’ve always recovered. It may have taken longer to bounce back sometimes, but each time eventually joy returned.

The truth is – it’s normal to get into a bad mood sometimes. EVERYONE has these days. It’s how we deal with them that makes the difference in our lives. Continue reading “Staying in the Flow with a Bad Mood Day”

Stories of Shift: Seeing a Future You Don’t Want

Gemma Rayne Fountain is a health support nut. For over 22 years she’s been helping people to come alive and realize how wonderful they are already so they can really love themselves. It doesn’t come by accident either. Gemma had to overcome a lot of her own perceptions of who she was and what she wanted. She’s applied this and her own weight loss journey and healing as well as hundreds of clients.

Here’s a quick wrap-up of her first shift interview (there’s 2):

Something Ain’t Right

Gemma didn’t have a lot of supervision when she was a teenager. She immigrated her with her parents who stayed very busy trying to learn the ways of US business. They weren’t able to support after-school activities with money or time so Gemma was on her own. Continue reading “Stories of Shift: Seeing a Future You Don’t Want”

Stop Faking It Hoping You’ll Make It

Fake it ’til you make it.

Since the very first time I heard this saying, something inside me cringed and cramped. I went through years of my life in and out of depression. Every time I tried to fake the smile and the attitude, I wanted to cry and scream even more. Yet, so many people continued to tell me, you just have to try harder. In essence, I was doing it wrong was the message I heard which just supported the stories that I was unworthy and incapable.

What I learned during my shifts and my healing is that faking it was never the way for true internal change – at least for me. I needed real action in order to shift my mood and my ‘tude. Continue reading “Stop Faking It Hoping You’ll Make It”

The Myths of Fear

If you are inviting shift, or seeking to grow in any way, you know fear. And wherever we go, our fear goes with us. It can cause anxiety, depression, and an greatly uninspired life. Usually because we have beliefs about fear that aren’t true. Here’s the biggest myths of fear and how we allow it guide us instead of the other way around.

Myth: Fear means I should stop.

You would be surprised how much I hear this. We can easily confuse our intuition with our fear because let’s face it – they are both voices floating in our head. There is a difference between intuition and our fear though, in fact, it’s quite normal for the two to disagree. Our intuition wants us to move forward and fear doesn’t. Continue reading “The Myths of Fear”