Find your wisdom by honoring your feelings and actually feeling them.
Whenever we choke down the feelings, ignore them, deny them or ‘suck it up’, we minimize their meaning and value. Sure it may be necessary to maintain composure, but they still need to be dealt with at some point. Otherwise, anger, shame, fear, sadness and even joy can get all jumbled up and of course show up at the most inopportune moments.
Our feelings are telling us something. If we try to not feel them or ignore them, we are telling our emotional body that it is wrong. That feeling those things are wrong. Living this way leads to stress and chronic disease, not to mention a life un-lived.
Our feelings are never wrong, they just are. Our reactions to them, well that’s an entirely different story because we can control what we do. When it comes to emotions, it is much the opposite. It’s letting go of them. It’s looking at the truth that lies behind them and letting the rest pass through us.
When we don’t look at these feelings, they start invading and sabotaging other areas of our life because they have to come out. We can prevent most emotional breakdowns by slowing down to feel them and let them pass.
Consider the elder or the crone archetype. She is able to hold all emotions like a paradox. She can hold life with death and light with dark. She can experience the joy of a new father and the pain of a dying loved one, even at the same time. She is able to sit in both as different and equal rites of passage.
That wise elder is in all of us, not just some of us. Some imagine an older version of themselves. Some imagine Mother Earth (and however she looks to the imaginer). Find your representation of that energy in you and draw on her to support you through the tough feelings.
When we feel the feelings and honor what comes, our wisdom will appear.